Mar 4, 2011

Ladka Bikau Hai ! (NaBloPoMo Post # 4)

So on the way home from work, I was sitting in the cab quietly minding my own business while the guy next to me was regaling everyone else with the marriage proposals he is getting.
“ Ek ladki to Lucknow ki hai, uske father railways mein hain acchi khaasi kamayi hai, doosri delhi mein naukri karti hai, software engineer hai, uski bhi salary achi hai, onsite bhi ja kar aayi hai, paisa to kamaya hoga, ek aur hai jo teacher hai lekin father ki property bahut hai Bareilly mein”
(One girl lives in Lucknow, her dad is in the railways, he must be earning really well, the other girl is a software engineer, she earns well, has been to onsite so must be having quite a bit stashed away, the third one is just a teacher but her dad has a lot of property in Bareilly)
What shocked me was that he was only concerned about the financial status of the Girls family. It was as if he was not talking about marriage but a business deal.Then came the biggest shock, he said
 “Haan Haan shaadi to wahin karenge jahan paisa jyada milenga”
(Ya ya, I am going to marry in the family that gives me the most money)
So finally my feminist self couldn’t take it anymore and I retorted –
“phir to aisa karo ek board laga lo apne ghar ke saamne jis pe likha ho Ladka Bikayu hai !” (So why don’t you just put a board in front of your house that says Boy for Sale!)
But seriously, this guy is an educated software engineer! Isn’t education doing anything to change our mentality?
I wish I had a begging bowl for each and every male out there who thinks like this!


  1. This is seriously disgusting. It's one thing to consider the social status and well being of the other family while forming an alliance.

    But this kind of greedy and money centric attitude is plain disgusting.

  2. So you see it not just a Happily Married Daughter who is a status symbol in our society, a Hefty Dowry, or a Kamau Wife (earning wife) is also a status symbol. Obviously this man will expect his wife to hand over whatever she earns/owns to him. I hope he is as honest to these prospective brides as he is being here.

  3. @Prats - yes it is disgusting ! what is more pathetic is the education is not changing anything !
    @IHM - yes, for such people a wife is more of a ATM than a companion !

  4. I can understand from whom this has come from???
    i remember once he had dicussed this earlier also.

    How outdated this guy is & his thinking.

    Feel sorry for such men and sorry for those girls who get married to such sick males.

  5. @Emmy - I guess you are the only one who really understands where this is coming from :)
    You are right I feel even more sorry for females who marry such sick guys

  6. THIS is what I am always talking about. No pride in making your way and achieving things with one's own effort. Most men (yes, I insist saying MOST men) want it easy and the richest girl they can find. They flaunt the goodies they get to their friends without any shame too! When you hear them talk about what they got for dowry, my skin burns with shame.. but not theirs apparently.
    They should sit in the market like you said and auction themselves, or their family will do it for them. I had written about this very thing when I had begun blogging. The most distressing thing is that the parents of girls want to give their children to such people along with the money! How weird society is!



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